People Who Pause: Designing a less hustle, more heart Kind of life with Maria Erausquin
In our People Who Pause Series, we will be conversing with individuals around the globe, offering an inspiring peek into their busy lives and/or businesses and why they need to decelerate to move ahead. This series will be accompanied by images of them pressing the pause button in their unique way. #peoplewhopause
“If I can have my tea whilst admiring the sunset, that to me, is a successful day.”
There’s something about Maria. When she first came for a meditation class at House of Pause, there was this quiet softness about her and the way she speaks. I admire that. The morning we were scheduled to do this profile piece on her, we found ourselves in the Instagram DMs changing the meeting schedule and we joked on how our slow-starting day suddenly went on to full hustling and bustling mode.
The conversation led to us talking about the meaning of hustle. Our understanding of it, and how we define it. Or do we need to redefine it? We took a pause and question what it means in today’s world.
So, Maria, what is your current ‘hustle’?
I’m in the process of launching my own studio, focusing on residential and commercial projects. This led me to develop some signature furniture pieces, which has shed a light on a process I deeply enjoy. It’s gradually turning into a furniture line, which I’m really excited about.
Bringing the point on hustling, what does hustle mean to you?
Hustle to me has a negative connotation and it’s a word I rarely use. I like to enjoy the things I do, to the point where I don’t even feel like it’s work. After working in a large design firm for six years, I experienced a demanding, fast-paced work schedule with constant deadlines. Although it was thrilling in the beginning, towards the end it became exhausting and numb. Hence why I wanted to explore venturing on my own, in order to find a pace that was aligned with my essence.
When was the last time you pressed the pause button?
It was after experiencing a burnout at my previous job. I noticed that for many months I was struggling to wake up and get out of bed. I needed to push myself to leave the house and bring my physical body into a place I didn’t want to be in. It took a while for me to come to terms with this and understand what was truly happening. I bashed myself a lot in the process, thinking that there is something wrong with me. I questioned my career, my existence and life itself. I knew deep down I was not aligned with my true essence. Perhaps what I experienced was my body’s way of telling me that it was rejecting my reality at the time. To the point where one day I was able to describe what I was feeling and it summed up to “My soul feels dead”.
I shared this thought with a friend and she immediately stopped me from saying that, pointing out the power of words. Although I knew what she meant, the feeling persisted. The joie de vivre was gone and that’s when I pressed pause and understood that there had to be something else to life than what felt like a constant struggle.
“My soul feels dead”. When did you bring it to life? And how?
Time brought it back to life.
The ability to allow myself to process everything instead of numbing emotions with socially acceptable “productivity”. I needed to align my soul with the essence of my being and recalibrate my body. The process took time, and although I had no idea what my life was going to look like, for the first time I allowed it to be and I gave my inner voice the attention it deserved. I decided to let go of the fears that have dominated my life, and simply trust the process. What I discovered was that what I enjoyed the most was to be. The simple act of being in full presence for a mere moment. Allowing myself to do this, was what gave me space and clarity to recalibrate the other aspects of my life.
What did you during this pause?
I knew it was time to restructure my life so I listened to myself. I left the design firm right before COVID hit (December 2019) and decided to take some time off to process. I had to purge a lot of emotions and belief systems that were embedded in me. For the first time, I didn’t put a time frame to my process. Although it took about two months, then lockdown happened and the entire world paused. Everyone was forced to look within. The timing felt quite magical. It made me realize that every big decision I’ve made in the past three years has led me to be prepared for this moment of uncertainty. In realizing that, I learned to trust myself despite anything. I didn’t know how things were going to turn out, but I knew that I had taken the right steps to carve out a new phase in my life.
What is different now for you?
My time is not for sale. I work based on things that have value to me and brings value those I work with.
A successful day is when I can pause with my tea to admire the sunset.
I can work as long as it’s at my own pace and in alignment with my values.
What are the lessons you learned during this slowing down?
To be okay with the uncertainty because I have a strong foundation in who I am.
To trust in my potential and capability.
To remember my own power (this seems to be the most challenging at times).
To be brave enough to surrender.
To be able to self-soothe without projecting or reacting to others.
Why do you think we go fast?
I guess we all still believe in measuring our success based on tangible productivity. But sometimes there are days that just require you to do nothing and be ok with just breathing. You’d be surprised by the positive impact those days can have on your life. However, the concept of rest and recovery is still expected to be instantaneous.
If you think about it, no one validates you for just being. If you are sitting in a cafe, you might feel weird if you are not doing something, whether it be on your phone/laptop or chatting with a friend. But why can’t we just exist in a space and enjoy that cup of coffee so that this can be an experience for my soul and allow that to be enough?
What would you change in society?
We can begin by having more empathy amongst each other.
It’s also important to take time to observe oneself. Observing what is holding us back internally or externally. Observe our own limitations. How we speak to ourselves in private. I hope people can remember who they are – and remember their power - instead of discovering, why not remember yourself again. You must take time to look within and constantly do the inner work to reach your core essence. It’s a commitment to honour the self. This is the true power of pause. The more we know ourselves, the easier it becomes to understand others.
Can we really decelerate?
Of course, but we need to choose to do so consciously. It’s only when we slow down that we are able to see things from a different perspective. Especially when it comes to human connections, for instance, if I admire a certain quality in a person, instead of feeling envy, “I connect with that quality because it is a reminder that I have that aspect within me too”. And of course, this works in the less ideal sense. When I see something that irritates me, I ask what is it that is truly triggering me? It is only when we decelerate that we become aware of our reflections and projections.
Some of your practices to slow down:
Pondering.
Pausing with tea to view the sunset, is my one daily practice that doesn’t feel demanding.
Meditating. Although sometimes I fall off for weeks or months. But I’m okay with that.
To have full presence in a conversation; the phone is rarely on the table when I meet someone.
Decluttering and having an organized space.